Sunday, October 23, 2011

Scarywood!!

So, this night was too crazily awesomely terrifying not to blog about! So many details, it couldn't just fit into one facebook status, I mean lets be real here! Now to help you all understand what a BIG deal this was for me, I'll let you in a few little secrets about me. 1. I'm TERRIFIED of heights 2. I am a SUPER jumpy person, Colin will walk into the room and I will jump and 3. I absolutely, completely, undeniably HATE clowns, I'm downright terrified of them!  So I find myself in a theme park full of scary looking monsters, zombies and worst of all....... CLOWNS!!!!!!!!!! Things jump out at you, or just walk right up to you and get in your face, roller coasters at night that go underground and backwards (for my first time might I add) Yeah, you know I LOVED that! Let's break the events of the night down, go one at a time so you get the full effect!

Blood Bayou!: So while standing in line for this attraction we actually almost left! Although the forecast called for a 20% chance of rain we got pounded with rain in the middle of a thunderstorm... in October no less... But it eventually stopped (right in time I might add) and we were able to enjoy ourselves a little more, even though we were soaked. So first creepy thing to happen to me actually turned out to be really fun and my favorite part of the night. This one guy, I don't know what kind of creep he was, but he was dressed in a top hat and a suit and had this CRAZY mask on, it looked like a face, but a very emotionless face. It had holes for the eyes and mouth and the chin on the mask was made so that a person could talk and it would move, but he didn't talk. He enjoyed walking up to people and just staring at them. So he is going down the line of people and he stops at me, of course, and gets right in my face and stares. Keep in mind this guy is TALL and it was just pouring rain, so my friend Crystal said "well that's not very nice, your top hat is dripping water on her!" So he took his top hat off and resumed his former stance. He then decided to do the same thing on the other side of me. Then suddenly, he backs off and he wants to play charades. He points at me and then takes a dancing pose and starts dancing. I kindly tell him that I don't dance (a lie of course) but compliment him on his dancing skills. He holds out his hand to me and I think "oh what the heck, why not!" and take it. And yes, he started dancing with me. And yes, it was VERY VERY fun! He was a nice monster/creeper guy! He moved on down the line and we were stuck being bored (minus the lightning show in the distance) in line for another 45 min to an hour. Once we got closer to the entrance to the haunted house, I started getting completely freaked out. Colin had to all but pull me into the place, and we still had to stand in line to get to the real thing. As soon as we walked through the door things started jumping out at us and I started screaming my head off. Colin of course was laughing the entire time. I was so scared I literally was about to puke and/or pass out. So at the end of it Colin was standing behind me basically holding me up and pushing me through till the end because I turned off. Seriously. No emotion on my face nothing. I went into a coma like state.  I felt sick for a good 30-40 minutes afterward. It was awful..... but I enjoyed it, kind of..... Especially the part when the totally harmless fake shrubbery scared Colin ;). As much as I didn't/did like the whole experience I may or may not want to do something like that again. Maybe it was so bad because it was my first time EVER being in a haunted house.... I dunno, you tell me!
Clowntown: After leaving the Haunted House we started towards the roller coasters, but to get there, to my horror, we had to go through Clowntown. Strobe lights, fog, and clowns everywhere... dead and alive. The flipping entrance to this place had 3 rows of clowns with 3 clowns per row HANGING. They were dolls of course, but I was scared none the less (remember in the beginning where I told you all how I feel about clowns?? Yeah, I hate those stupid things dolls or not) So Colin took my hand, Carly grabbed my arm and I put my head down and watched my feet while they lead me through because I was WAY too wimpy to try and get through that (I kind of understand how Scooby Doo and Shaggy feel whenever they run into ghosts... it is absolutely terrifying...). Every once in a while I'd catch a glimpse of on of the hanging dolls feet and one clown guy even got in my face and said "Welcome to Clowntown". If I had control of my arms I probably would've punched him due to reflexes.... luckily I had Colin and Carly holding me down and after being so traumatized in the Haunted house I couldn't really make sudden movements without feeling dizzy and sick.. We made it through, barely....

(Side note: I had nightmares about clowns all last night. It was horrible. My first thought waking up this morning was "Why did God allow men to create the idea of clowns... there is no use for them in the world. They need to just disappear"  And upon further consideration I had a very profound thought. You know how in the Bible they call Lucifer "The Great Serpent"? Well that should have been different. He should be called "The Great Clown" because clowns are far more terrifying and deceitful than snakes. They have a smile on their face and they wear bright happy colors, but really they are terrible things that will kill you. If I had to choose what I am more afraid of, clowns vs. snakes, clowns would win EVERY time.)

Tremors: Roller Coaster of Death and Terror is what it should have been called! Colin, wisely, forgot to mention that this roller coaster takes you underground.... yeah... I didn't like that. Now again, let me remind you that this is my first time ever on a roller coaster. My first time ever was at NIGHT. Pitch black night. After being traumatized by zombies and monsters and clowns beforehand. By this time I know I must have completely gone maniacal because I was about to get on a roller coaster that would climb to 100 ft and then drop 103 ft into an underground tunnel... And I am afraid of heights.... Needless to say, I did have fun (after a truly terrifying haunted house and clowns anything was better) and our picture turned out AWESOME! If they had gotten it at the right angle you could have seen my tonsils!

Timber Terror: Well if one roller coaster wasn't enough lets just add another! Going backwards! This drop was only 85 ft, so not as bad. I really liked this one, It was fun, but surprisingly I screamed a lot more on it. I felt completely weightless the whole time and I didn't know what to expect because we were going backwards. I felt like I was falling straight down back first! I think I liked this one the best and it was less scary because I was so numbed by everything else haha! Colin even thought that one was scarier! 

So lets recap:
1. I danced with a very charming masked man in a top hat.
2. I was scared senseless in a haunted house
3. I barely survived Clowntown
4. I went on 2 Roller Coasters, at night, for the first time, one backwards and I'm scared of heights.

And I lived to tell the tale!